it’s our age…

We’ve had a very hard couple of weeks – Mr FF’s dad died on the 10th, he’d been ill with a type of dementia for about 18 months, and had been physically ill on & off in that time too, he was 80 and most of it was the sort of thing that’s expected at that age, but the dementia was obviously weakening him too and in the last month he went downhill very rapidly 😦 I don’t think he’d have ever wanted to go into residential care – I can just imagine what he’d have said about any kind of home if he could, no words would have been minced! so it has been a blessing that we never had to make that choice for him. None the less it has been extremely hard for Mr FF, his mother & sister, and to a slightly lesser extent, the children and I. An expected death is still a huge loss, and you *think* you’re prepared for it, and then find you’re not. I have found it hard to watch Mr FF deal with it all, and not to be able to make it better, nor make the journey with him, my job is to be there if I’m needed, I have been learning not to put my expectations of how he should be feeling & behaving on to him, but to give him space to grieve in his way – I’m maybe not very good at that, but I’m trying!

and we’re not the only ones amongst our friends dealing with this sort of thing with our parents 😦

as I said… it’s our age, sandwich generation stuff


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